NOTHING TO SAY…
I really have nothing at all to say, but I’ve been doing so well with adding something each day for my first week that I just had to continue.
Since I have nothing to say, I guess I’ll have to add a personal journal entry, so here goes.
I just got home and was quite surprised at how much the temperature has dropped over the last 24 hours. I suppose if I would listen to the radio instead of CDs, or check the Internet before leaving the house, I might not be as surprised. It’s just that I have generally come to NOT trust weather reports. Most of the time they are not very accurate.
I remember once it was pouring all day long. I don’t mean just little sprinkles, I mean it was coming down in very large barrels, not just buckets. After a few hours of torrential downpours, I had the radio on and heard the DJ say there was a “50% chance of rain today.” All I could do was laugh in disbelief.
I could see if he was broadcasting from far away or talking about some other location, but he wasn’t. I happened to live within a few miles of the station and he was talking about our area. I was so amazed at that ridiculous forecast, I waited to hear the next one to see if he would change it or I somehow spazed out and didn’t hear it correctly.
The next weather forecast came and he said the same thing, 50% chance of rain that day. The torrential downpours had not let up at all since his last forecast. For the first time in my life, I called a radio station.
I got the DJ on the phone and very calmly and seriously asked if he was crazy. He claimed he was not and wondered why I asked such a thing. Before I answered his inquiry, I asked if he was in a room with no windows. He told me no, he had windows in the room he was in. I then asked if he was deaf and/or blind. Now he became irritated at my questions and wanted to know what I wanted.
I told him what I wanted was for him to change what he says for a weather forecast of being a 50% chance of rain because unless he was blind, deaf, crazy, or in a windowless, below-ground bunker, he could surely see that it was pouring like crazy outside, which would change his forecast to 100 damn percent chance of rain.
He refused. He told me it didn’t matter if it was raining, there was still only a 50% chance of it.
As I stood there watching and listening to the rain, I could not understand that logic. I tried helping him. “Maybe when that forecast was written there was only a 50% chance of rain, but any normal, sane person can see that it has now changed and since it is currently raining as it has been all day, that would change the chance of rain to 100%!
He refused to change his forecast. I told him he was an idiot and I couldn’t listen to idiots. I suppose it was company policy or something and he couldn’t change weather forecasts, the poor schlub.
FEELS LIKE…
Now I notice the weather forecasts try to add a little excitement by telling you not only how cold it is, but also how cold it really feels like.
I think I heard one say the other day, “Well, it is only 48 degrees out, but when you add in the 22 mile per hour wind from the Northeast and take into account the amount of cloud cover expected between Noon and 6, the barometric pressure from the ocean, and the Al Gore global warming index factor, that 48 degrees will really feel like it’s only 43.”
Who the hell cares? Do you think I give a hoot if it feels 5 degrees less than what you said it is supposed to feel like? Who are you to say how cold it’s suppose to feel anyway? You’d probably say there’s only a 50% chance of rain when it’s pouring out. Why should I believe when you tell me it’s going to be 48 degrees out?
I swear they do that just to impress themselves (or their mommies, the little geeks). You ever watch them when they tell you about that “Feels like” temperature?
They look all proud, like they just figured out the secret to the Universe. “Today it’s going to be 55…but it will only feel like 49” (smile, snicker, stick chest out).
“Tomorrow it will be dropping down into the forties, but with the wind out of the west (pause so you pay attention to their intelligent wisdom), it will feel like only 37, so you kids better bundle up when you go to school.”
I love how it’s the wind chill factor in the winter and the heat index in the summer. Oh really? The sun will be out in July and it might feel warmer than it really is if we are out in it naked? Give me a break!
What I can tell you is today, right now right where I am, it’s colder than a witch’s (something…nose I think).
It’s not only cold, but it “feels like” it’s very cold. It feels like you should put a warm coat on and if you’re frail, old, or have frostbite in 3 of your fingers because your stupid cousin made you go snowmobiling for 12 hours when you were a teenager, then maybe you might even want to think about wearing some gloves.
I think I posted a note the other day about being a nice warm 40-something. Right now it’s 9 degrees outside and 44 inside. I hate when it gets so cold you have to wear a sweater and a hat in the house. I’m 39, but I “feel like” 56 when I have to wear my sweatshirt and hat to bed because it’s so cold.
TOM THE WEATHER GUY…
I used to work with Tom. He was a student going to school to become a weatherman. Guess how much I laughed when he first told me that? I do beleive that was probably the funniest college major I had ever heard of. Who the heck pays thousands of dollars to learn how to tell people stuff that isn’t true day in and day out? All I can say is…why?
Why would anyone pay good college tuition money to learn such a ridiculous trade? Are you kidding me?
I swear I laughed at Tom every day because of his chosen field of study. I didn’t mean to, but I couldn’t help it. Every time I would see him, I’d just start laughing and yell out something like, “Tom, Tom, the weather guy. Whatever he tells you is a big fat lie.”
Tom was actually a nice guy and I liked him alot, but I just could not understand why, and he wasn’t much help explaining his reasons. I think he figured it would keep him out of trouble if nobody ever expected him to be right about anything. “What the hell,” he’d say. “Tell people it might not rain and then it rains. Oh well. Who would know? Nobody can predict the weather, right?”
Yeah, right Tom. Good luck with that.
I was actually happy when I ran into Tom last year and found out he finally grew and matured a little and came to his senses. He switched his major to Business and hopes to graduate this year and find a real job. “Yeah, good luck with that,” I told him.
WEBMASTER WILLY…
If you haven’t heard, I have this friend Willy. Willy’s another one of those sappy college kids who thinks some day he will learn just the right thing to help him make it in world. In the mean time, he’s helping me out with my website for free. Willy’s not that good and doesn’t know anything about design, programming, or to be honest, how exactly the Internet works, but he’s a good egg and we get along okay. We drink beers, play pool, talk trash, and do some other stuff I better not mention, and we both seem to have a good time of it.
After telling Willy about some of the stuff I do and some of the help I’d love to have, the dumb ass volunteered to help. So now he picks up a little, sweeps occaisionally, feeds the cats, and works on the website as much as he can. It’s like a work in progress for him. He means well and he’s learning more and more each day, but I can’t really say I’m waiting to see a miracle from him. (sorry, buddy).
Willy is actually so sweet, he’ll probably read that and be happy I mentioned him. Anyway, I do mention him to tell you that in between beers we’ve been talking about the website a bit and some things we’d like to do. Okay, to be more exact, things I’d like him to do.
A SOFT OPENING…
It was during these discussions when I was letting Willy beat me at a game of pool…somewhere around the fourth or fifth beer that we both agreed it would be a hoot to add the link to both my Flickr photo page and this personal blog to the website and not tell anyone, just to see if anyone would notice.
I likened it to a “soft opening” I had experienced in retail chains. If you’re not familiar with that term, it’s when they open a new store and are not sure exactly what day it will be ready to open. They pick a date for the “Grand Opening” that factors in all the problems that could occur and allows for things they wish they didn’t have to deal with (like licenses, late shipments, paying people to pass inspections, etc.). If somehow the retail planets align right and whichever crazy person in charge manages to get the store open earlier than that chosen advertised grand opening date, they call that the “soft opening.”
So Willy and I decided to do our “soft opening” of the links from the website yesterday and then in a week or so I’ll send out a notice to the mailing list for all those who do not check the site often or who have not signed up for the change detection on the 3 website pages that have that sign up (including the home page – so don’t blame us if you didn’t notice the change).
So there you have it. As I said, I have nothing to say tonight. I hope you enjoyed my nothingness. If you are still reading, thanks. Now go back to my Flickr page or website and look at some of my pictures, or send me an email to tell me how awesome you really think I am.
Ty
Posted by Ty Randall 